I Know This Place Like the Back of My Hand

Written by - Wanda Rodriguez

Written - January 31, 2025

Published - March 19, 2025

That’s a funny saying if you think about it, knowing a place like the back of your hand.  What does that mean exactly?  Every line, scar, vein, freckle, bone, etc.  is easily recognizable to you.  I guess we really do spend a lot of time looking at the back of our hands, even if unconsciously. I take the saying to mean you know it very well, in great detail, intimately.  So then it is safe to assume that when people use the phrase in everyday conversation that they are implying that they know something to that same degree.  The irony is that the phrase is most often dropped when people are acting in contrast to the meaning. 

For example, one of my favorite memories that I shared with my late husband, Dave, happened early on in our relationship.  We were still in college and going to a nearby location for which parking was tight, to say the very least.  As he was confidently attempting to park in this small space, and naturally backing in (yes, he was one of those people!), I commented about the tight parking and suggested looking elsewhere and walking.  Previous circumstances had already soured his mood a bit, and the parking situation was doing nothing to quell the tensions. 

Needless to say, my suggestion was not well received and in response, Dave confidently replied, “No.  I know this place like the back of my …..” Here the word hand quickly trailed off as it was interrupted by the unmistakable sound of metal on metal.  I could have sworn that I saw a little puff of smoke release from Dave’s nose as he proclaimed loudly, “Don’t say anything!  Not a word!”  My face was about to explode as I was fighting with all of my might not to bust out laughing!  The timing couldn’t have been more perfect.  I mean, it was awful and unfortunate for sure, but hilarious at the same time!  Sitcom level funny!  Damage was assessed and the situation dealt with, all the while I sat there like the Cheshire cat, ever quiet and grinning like a goob from ear to ear! 

When he got back in the car he was a smidge more composed and he was eventually able to laugh about it.  And laugh we did, for the next 30 plus years!  Whenever the opportunity presented itself, one or both of us would whip out that famous line, but never finish because when we got to the word, hand, we would make a grinding metal sound with our mouths and hysterical laughter would come pouring from the both of us.  It would instantly defuse a potentially stressful situation and leave us in stitches.  Inside jokes between couples and friends can be so corny or simple, and yet so meaningful.  If someone were to randomly use that phrase, for example, you might not think twice about it.  However, when the person you share the story with says it, then you are somehow magically transported right back to the place in time where the inside joke was born and it’s just as funny as it was the first time you shared it.  That takes an already special bond, and just puts a few layers of tape on it for reinforcement.  Shared inside humor just has some sort of magic healing power filled with joy.  Have you ever tried to explain it to someone else nearby, a friend perhaps who is in the room when two of you start laughing like hyenas and you end up saying something like, well, it was funny at the time, or you had to be there, or it doesn’t translate well?  The third party here is often looking at you with that same confused expression, accompanied by a slight sideways tilt of the head, as a confused dog.  They stare blankly at you, seemingly trying to figure out exactly what is wrong with you.   Ultimately this usually just makes you laugh harder and their response might get added to the “laugh track” down the road when it inevitably comes up again.  You know, something like this, Remember when we tried to explain why we were laughing so hard and they looked at us like we were from Mars?  Your eyes may start to water because you are laughing so hard.  Those are what I like to call good core memories.  

Fast forward to yesterday.  I was the passenger in a car with a friend traveling to a nearby venue.  Along the way we were chit chatting away only to look up and realize we had taken a wrong turn and were now heading in the opposite direction.  This was coupled with other little travel mishaps that happened along the way.  Nothing major, just minor setbacks and annoyances.  The thing is that with each one my friend got more and more frustrated.  I tried to pull out my best Pollyanna attitude and kept tossing out ways to put positive spins on it.  This was to no avail, really.  Eventually I couldn’t contain it anymore and I just started laughing, especially when we started passing the same places again.  It was like an old time cartoon where they keep running the same background past you over and over.  Trying to be respectful, I promised no teasing for at least 24 hours (I didn’t quite make it) but the laughter just could no longer be contained. The Chesire cat was back but showed less resolve this go round.   I found myself wanting to share my inside joke story about Dave “knowing this place like the back of his …” but decided against it.  One reason I kept quiet was the uncertainty of how well this might translate out of context, but it remained stuck in my head.  Especially after my friend was expressing frustration (understatement!) about having gone the wrong way even though they used to live nearby and knew the place well.  Still, I decided it might just add fuel to the fire and I wanted the negative feelings to dissipate and not spread so I decided not to share and to just let time get things back on track.

Here's where it gets funny, at least to me.  As my friend continued to fume about these mishaps on the road, guess what phrase was uttered?!?!?!  You guessed it, “… I know this place like the back of my hand…”  This was said not once but twice.  I thought that my mind was litterally going to explode! I started to tell the story after the first time but still decided that the timing just wasn’t right.  After the second time the phrase popped out, I decided that this story needs to be shared and that writing about it would be the best way to do it.  As I share now, I can’t help but wonder if your head is tilted ever so slightly to the side as you read and try to make sense of it all. Ha!  That image makes me laugh as well!

So, here I sit writing about the phrase and the inside jokes we share with friends and loved ones and how special they can be.  They are special when we actively share them with them, but also when our recall is triggered and we experience them alone.  Still funny.  Still heart warming.  Sometimes, like in my case, I will never be able to share that joke with Dave again but I will forever find that phrase to be humorous and it will always take me right back in time to my early 20’s and that exact moment.  A time when anger and frustration gave way to laughter and lifelong memories.  Memories that I am happy to share with you now, along with the reminder that sometimes laughter is the best medicine to turn a negative into a positive, and a frustrating situation into a lifelong happy memory.  Always look for the positives.  Strive for joy and laughter whenever possible.